-titles
-Sentences that are beautifully written
-Quotes that are too long, thus making the whole sentence somewhat awkward
Leave It Behind:
An Essay About Relationships between “Walk On” and My Grandmother and The Youngers
by Inpyo Hong
9th Grade English
Pine Point School
11/01/11
Elias A. Ford said, “Every hardship; every joy; every temptation is a challenge of spirit; that the human soul may prove itself.” “Walk On” portrays the adversities that we go through in life. My grandmother and the Youngers in “A Raisin in the Sun” have several resemblances with “Walk On”. We have to walk on and progress even though we confront many afflictions.
To begin with, “Walk On” and my grandmother have a few similarities. Firstly, the verse that says, “You’re packing a suitcase for a place none of us has been. A place that has to be believed to be seen,” has a connection with my grandmother. People have to survive, people have to be strong, people have to hold fast to their morals, no matter what they confront in their life, just like being ready to go to “a place none of us has been.” (Anaphora) My grandmother was strong, she never complained about her health even though the lower part of her body was paralyzed before she passed away. Furthermore, a line of the song says, “And love is not the easy thing. The only baggage you can bring. Is all that you can’t leave behind,” has another relationship to my grandmother. To me, the lyric means that love is the only thing we may take to heaven after we die. My grandmother’s last expression was a grin (F.A.S.T.); it seemed to me she was bringing all the love she had received to heaven. Thus, my grandmother became strong, survived, held fast to her morals, took love to heaven, which exhibit the resemblances with “Walk On”. (Asyndeton)
Not only does my grandmother have similarities with “Walk on”, “A Raisin in the Sun” has a couple connections. The lyric that says, “Walk on, walk on. What you got, they can't steal it,” has a relationship with African American family in “Raisin in the Sun”. Lena Younger—a character who is called “Mama” from “A Raisin in the Sun”—bought a house in the town where white people mostly live. Mr. Karl Linder, the only white character in the play, the person from “Clybourne Park Improvement Association,” the person who is ridiculed (F.A.S.T.) by Walter Lee Younger, attempts to convince the Younger family to reconsider (F.A.S.T.) moving into the town, but the Youngers do not change their decision. (Asyndeton) Additionally, the verse that says, “And I know it aches. And your heart it breaks. You can only take so much. Walk on,” has another resemblance. Walter, a man who is supposed to be the pillar of his family, a man who dreams of being successful with his friends, investigates most of the money he received from his dad to a liquor store venture. (Anaphora) Even though he loses the money he invested, and hurts his family, he always ascertains (F.A.S.T.) solutions to make his family survive. Hence, the Youngers do not let Mr. Linder to beguile them to change their decision, and Walter find solutions and walks on no matter what happens like U2 revealed in their song.
To conclude, we have to surmount the adversities we encounter and move on. My grandmother confronted a multitude of hardships, but she survived and walked on. The Youngers do not let themselves fall into any difficult situation. Therefore, “Walk On”, my grandmother, and the Youngers mirror Elias A. Ford’s concept: “Every hardship; every joy; every temptation is a challenge of spirit; that the human soul may prove itself.”
Self Assessment:
1. One writing issue I am trying to work on: I am continuing to work on using right grammar and apt words to make my sentences flow.
2. One possible strong point I see in this essay: I believe the transitions I wrote my writing flow. Also, by using anaphora and asyndeton, I made my my sentences stronger.
3. One possible weak point I see in this essay: I might have not used good examples for each quotes.
4. I would give myself an A-.
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